Dear
Journal,
This is the first day at the rocky fortress. I have just
completed the barrier outside and am now lying in a disgusting cave. It’s unbelievable
what I have caused. If it weren't for me, we would still be on the boat, safe.
I do not think I will ever be able to forgive myself for this disaster. Along
with this I have tried to eat my best friend.
I have no idea how at that party I could possibly have lost my mind and tried
to eat him. It seems as if I have turned into a heartless killer. I have so much
self-doubt in my ability to control my craving for food that I have decided to
confine myself in this rocky cell, where I am unable to harm anyone.
 |
| This is a picture from the first afternoon on the beach |
I never thought I
would be living in a reality when I am unable to even approach my best friends
without them being constantly cautious that at any moment they could be my next
meal. It’s horrific to have that thought whether my friends will ever trust me
or even accept me again. It takes a lot of faith to trust someone who just tried
to kill you. To have this problem on top of being stuck on an island full of a
bunch of senseless lemurs and no long- term food source is a horrendous
thought.
I always have the
thought in mind, wondering if we are ever going back to New York or if we are
going to be stuck here forever. It is becoming more obvious every day that help
is not coming and, I’ll be honest, there is no way I will be able to survive if
I don’t eat. Our only hope is for all of us to work together and create some
sort of way to make it back home. If only I was able to contact the others
without frightening them and losing my mind.
I have no clue how I would greet Gloria, Marty and Melman
after what happened, let alone earn their trust back. It is frightening to
accept the possibility that our friendships may never be the same again. I have
noticed, however, in the past that my friends will never give up on me,
especially Marty. I am confident he will come looking for me some time. In the
meantime, I need to find another food source, that doesn’t involve eating my
friends. If this is accomplished then it may decide if I live or not.
I will write again next time I get the chance.
Until next time,
Alex
